tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-76649608653247689952024-03-13T05:00:39.555-07:00God's WarriorMelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-81698110868870841892014-08-21T20:01:00.000-07:002014-08-21T21:05:18.297-07:00Wow, what a week it has been! I am overwhelmed with the support I have gotten from other home school moms, notes, texts, posts, it has been just when I needed it. Also Darin has been super supportive and a great listening ear as we tweak our schedule and find our routine.<br />
<br />
We started this week talking about creation and working on letters. I am happy with the progress he has made this week. We think Zane is a numbers man, not a letters man. But there is a letters game we have been playing (simple flash cards, who knew?) and his grandparents bought him a book, Magic Treehouse #1 and it seems like with the combination of those two things, he is wanting to read (and by this I mean, being read to) AND learn his letters. Woo hoo! So we are headed out tomorrow to the Lincoln Library to find more Magic Treehouse books, renew our card and get more books to go with our units. I have already read the entire book to him and his dad just started over with it so we have to get more for our own sanity.<br />
<br />
A little bit of the tweaking has been that I have had to jump ahead in lessons, the first 10 lessons were not enough for him apparently so I decided to add some more things in to challenge him so that was a challenge for me to hurry up and finish preparing the lessons from the first week in September.<br />
<br />
Tomorrow after the library we are headed off to Morrill Hall and the planetarium. If anyone has good ideas of making a solar system we would love to hear it! <br />
<br />
<br />Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-60081199904188672052014-08-18T08:34:00.000-07:002014-08-18T08:34:07.438-07:00Well, it's been a while since I have posted. I guess it's fitting to start now for a couple of reasons. One, we are at the two year mark on Wednesday of my re constructive surgery. That was the 8 1/2 hour surgery. But we are recovering and starting a new adventure!<br />
<br />
Last March, Darin and I felt a strong calling from God to home school Zane. This was not a decision we took lightly. I am at times overwhelmed with the responsibility I have for his education. At the same time, I am overwhelmed with joy to be the one to teach him to read, write,...And of course FIELD TRIPS. Zane and I love field trips! We are also thrilled because we have some very special people that we are blessed to call friends that home school as well. So our play dates and field trips are going to be awesome. We are also very excited to meet new people on our adventure. <br />
<br />
Here is a picture of the kindergartner. He woke up by himself at 7:30 which rarely happens and wanted to start right away. I negotiated coffee first and we got down to it. The formal school work, took about an hour. We are using My Father's World which starts with the 7 days of creation. So the first seven days of school we are going to be doing a bit different activities. Also, next week we have a State Fair trip planned to the State's Largest Classroom. The following week a trip to Edgerton Science Museum for a lab. <br />
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<br />
Some of the activities we have planned at home in addition to his formal school work are playing, reading and playing. All the things a 6 year old should be doing! We are going to try to slip in some music lessons, swim lessons, plays at Lied Center, Orpheum and Rose Theater and cooking. The music lessons we will probably wait a bit on. It's a book for me to teach him piano aimed at home schoolers. I played all through high school so I am hoping that I can at least get him started. <br />
<br />
So stay tuned for more updates!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-68133734980101639452012-09-09T11:30:00.000-07:002012-09-09T11:30:25.391-07:00Catching up!Wow! I really dropped the ball. I have been keeping my own FB updated, which is pretty easy to do, a few quick sentences. After my last chemo I had a really hard time putting thoughts together and having the energy at the end of the day to write anything. I spent the time as I should have, with my family. Many ideas for posts came to me and I never wrote it down. Hopefully I will remember some stuff I wanted to share! I am also going to be sharing more of my journey, what Zane has gone through and some tips I have for those that are going through the cancer journey or their family. I am also going to be posting some things that Zane and I are up to.<br />
<br />
The reason why? Because the one thing that has probably impacted me the most through this cancer journey is that did not have my priorities straight. Time and time again I put my family behind so many things, good things but just 'things'. Not 'things' God wanted me to do, just busy church work. So I taking time off ministry to get my priorities straight the best I can, I know I will never get it totally right but I though that some might be able to relate to my journey, we can give each other encouragement and pray for each other. Here is a quick update since my last chemo<br />
<br />
Radiation started end of April, last radiation was June 11th. Radiation was give days a week for right around six weeks.<br />
<br />
On August 20th I had my breast reconstruction. So as of tomorrow I am just three weeks out. I am doing good for what was done, it takes awhile, it was an intense surgery and I was under for 8 1/2 hours. It takes a body a while to recover from that. I will be sharing more on this. We are THRILLED with the results.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-55903488823121322742012-03-29T15:33:00.001-07:002012-03-29T16:50:24.938-07:00Last Chemo!Today I had my last chemo. I have to apologize if this post seems disjointed. I do have some fogginess from the treatment but feel really good.<br />
<br />
We got some GREAT news. There was no heart damage due to one of the drugs I was taking. There is a decrease in my heart function but not below the normal range and it should reverse. So I will be able to take that drug and keep up on the heart scans. Heart problems are the only side effect and we have a great Dr. whom we trust to keep a good eye out on it all. We don't feel like cattle being moved through there. And one of the best pieces of news.... since I was just getting one chemo drug today, I can skip the Neulasta shot which really took me down each time I had it.<br />
<br />
I feel good. Shawn, one of my besties and I went out to eat at Carlos O Kelly's, (I did skip the Margaritas) then back to Seward for pedicures and shopping for clothes for the kiddos! Also found a cute cute hat for me and some cute clothes for Zane. I am resting now and hope that the rest the weekend is as smooth. We are doing great on meals and hopefully can spend some quality time with Kailey, Zane and Darin.<br />
<br />
Thank you for all your prayers. How did I know that you were all praying? (besides you telling me!) When Shawn and I stepped out of the car and said our see yas, we turned around and the pair of doves were on the electric line by the house. I tried to take a picture but they flew away. So God heard your prayers for me and for others. He wanted me to tell you that and that He loves us all very much. He can say a lot with no words. I also love you all too!<br />
<br />
Also wanted to add that last month, right before my previous chemo, I was working Klu, the gelding I had an accident with last summer. I of course was nervous at times wondering how he would act. He as super, going to be the horse I have always hoped he would be. And it will be ok, because many days when we went on a walk to cool off after a good workout, the doves were right there in the trees next to the round pen and flying in front of us as we walked.<br />
<br />
Then while at my last appointment, my platelets JUMPED up out of the anemia range with no treatment, either meds or supplements.<br />
<br />
So I don't have proof of HOW it happened but I don't need it. Always good news when I see those white birds flying around. This is why..<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auNe5Hm5KnU">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auNe5Hm5KnU</a><br />
<br />
<strong>Call On Jesus Nicole C Mullen</strong><br />
I'm so very ordinary<br />
Nothing special on my own<br />
Oh, and I have never walked on water<br />
And I have never calmed a storm<br />
<br />
Sometimes I'm hiding away<br />
From the madness around me<br />
Like a child who's afraid of the dark<br />
<br />
When I call on Jesus, all things are possible<br />
I can mount on wings like eagles and soar<br />
When I call on Jesus, mountains are gonna fall<br />
'Cause He'll move Heaven and earth to come rescue me when I call<br />
<br />
Weary brother, broken daughter<br />
Widowed, widowed lover, you're not alone<br />
<br />
If you're tired and scared<br />
Of the madness around you<br />
If you can't find the strength to carry on<br />
<br />
When you call on Jesus, all things are possible<br />
You can mount on wings like eagles and soar<br />
When you call on Jesus, mountains are gonna fall<br />
'Cause He'll move Heaven and earth to come rescue you when you<br />
<br />
Call Him in the mornin', in the afternoon time<br />
Late in the evenin', He'll be there<br />
When your heart is broken and you feel discouraged<br />
You can just remember that He said, He'll be there<br />
<br />
When I call on Jesus, all things are possible<br />
I can mount on wings like eagles and soar<br />
When I call on Jesus, mountains are gonna fall<br />
'Cause He'll move Heaven and earth to come rescue me when I call<br />
<br />
When I call on Jesus, all things are possible<br />
I can mount on wings like eagles and soar<br />
When I call on Jesus, mountains are gonna fall<br />
'Cause He'll move Heaven and earth to come rescue me when I call<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you remember the last post about Zane talking to me about Jesus saving him if a dinosaur steps on him? And then this song comes to mind as I am writing today. I truly believe the Holy Spirit is guiding Zane for me and probably to be truthful in spite of me.<br />
<br />
Thank you Lord Jesus.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-23418619629181170032012-03-19T07:21:00.000-07:002012-03-19T07:21:51.130-07:00Martina Mc Bride I'm Gonna Love You Through It<b>Thank you to my husband Darin, my family and my friends who are loving me through this. I would have given up if it wasn't for you. </b><br />
<br />
<br />
<b>"I'm Gonna Love You Through It"</b><br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-left: 10px; margin-right: 10px;"> She dropped the phone and burst into tears<br />
The doctor just confirmed her fears<br />
Her husband held it in and held her tight<br />
Cancer don’t discriminate or care if you’re just 38<br />
With three kids who need you in their lives<br />
He said, "I know that you’re afraid and I am, too<br />
But you’ll never be alone, I promise you"<br />
<br />
When you’re weak, I’ll be strong<br />
When you let go, I’ll hold on<br />
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes<br />
When you feel lost and scared to death,<br />
Like you can’t take one more step<br />
Just take my hand, together we can do it<br />
I’m gonna love you through it.<br />
<br />
She made it through the surgery fine<br />
They said they caught it just in time<br />
But they had to take more than they planned<br />
Now it's forced smiles and baggy shirts<br />
To hide what the cancer took from her<br />
But she just wants to feel like a woman again<br />
She said, "I don't think I can do this anymore"<br />
He took her in his arms and said "That's what my love is for"<br />
<br />
When you’re weak, I’ll be strong<br />
When you let go, I’ll hold on<br />
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes<br />
When you feel lost and scared to death,<br />
Like you can’t take one more step<br />
Just take my hand, together we can do it<br />
I’m gonna love you through it.<br />
<br />
And when this road gets too long<br />
I'll be the rock you lean on<br />
Just take my hand, together we can do it<br />
I’m gonna love you through it.<br />
I’m gonna love you through it. </div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-73681892702746364442012-03-17T07:30:00.000-07:002012-03-17T07:30:34.075-07:00Shirt and Shoes required, boobs optionalI have had a lot of questions about how I am feeling. Well, I am doing pretty good. I get pretty weak during the 7 days after chemo then a light switch turns back on and I feel great. My counts have been good. No fevers, no major sickness.<br />
<br />
What is it like the rest of the time? I have a lot I want to do, some things I can't but plan to do and some things I don't want to deal with. I have trouble sleeping, either going to sleep or staying asleep. I get night sweats. I wake up and start thinking. Am I worrying? Well, kinda but not anything "big" just little things I need to do. Happened this morning, fell asleep well then woke up at 3:30, finally got up at 5:00 and decided maybe I should actually do something instead of laying there thinking about doing it.<br />
<br />
Yes, there are big things that are bothering me. Still having a hard time with my breasts being gone. I don't talk much about it except to close friends and Darin. You wouldn't believe how many times I have heard, "they are just breasts, at least your family has you" (have you seen my family? Of course they are happy to have me, I am the most sane of them all jk Chelle,) "I don't think I would even care if they took my breasts" What I want to do is pull up my shirt and say so you can look like this? Super, lets try it! But I smile and say, "Yep, I bet each person would handle it differently"<br />
<br />
It's like, pull up your big girl panties and move on.<br />
<br />
I am working hard on my "self image" that isn't really mine, is it? Shouldn't I be reflecting God's image instead of my own? Honestly I am struggling with this.<br />
<br />
Genesis 1:27 "So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."<br />
<br />
Ephesians 4:21-23 "when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. <br />
<br />
Honestly, does God care my boobs are gone? Well, what I have gotten to know about Him, He does, because He cares about what is bothering me.<br />
<br />
1 Peter 5:7 "Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you."<br />
<span class="versiontext"></span><br />
Matthew 6:30 "And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?"<br />
<br />
I have to stay here to take care of my family. My will?<br />
<br />
Psalm 40:8 "take joy in doing your will, my God, for your instructions are written on my heart."<br />
<br />
(oh please write away!!)<br />
<br />
But I look like..... <b>I HAVE CANCER!</b><br />
<br />
I have less hair than my husband, I have not lost any weight, in fact I have gotten even more flabby with all the laying around. I have two huge scars on my flat chest which make my already big stomach look bigger. What does my husband see when he looks at me?!<br />
<br />
Genesis 2:24 "This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one."<br />
<br />
"For better or for worse, for rich or poor, in sickness or in health." He is keeping our marriage vows.<br />
<br />
On Thursday we had Miss Cora over for a playdate. I was in a t shirt and zipper sweatshirt and wasn't wearing my fakes. We left without me giving a second thought to go to McDonalds. It was getting warm so I took off my sweatshirt and in the midst of getting those two hoodlums in safely and never put it back on. I didn't realize it until I stepped in the the building. Mind you, this was not a baggy t shirt but a fitted one. You see, I am not just flat now, but concave. And this t shirt showed every little curve or the reversal of said curves. I felt naked. <br />
<br />
Have you ever had a dream that you are walking out in public with no shirt on or no pants? I do. Actually, just had a dream the night before this that I was walking around the mall with just a t shirt and undies. Though in my dream I think my legs were thinner. In my dream, no one even seems to notice I am not wearing pants.<br />
<br />
So this pretty much how the conversation in my head went.<br />
<br />
Should I turn around and take them back out and get my sweatshirt? Would anyone notice? Oh, they are looking at me! Oh wait, they want me to order. I give myself a pep talk or was it a prayer? I don't remember. I order. Not one seems to notice I have no breasts. Ok this is good. I can do this. I turn around and take these two adorable skipping children to sit down and everyone is looking at... them!<br />
<br />
Oh good, this is going to be fine. Square your shoulders, I mean really this is the reality of this "disease". Cancer takes your hair, your breasts, your life. This is even better than pink! I am a warrior, I am strong! There is a table of younger men, probably on break from construction, they turn and look at me and they get a shocked look on their face They quickly look away. Oh man, they noticed, I mean it was all women at the front, they weren't looking at my boobs, but what else did I expect if a guy saw me, I mean, it's like the first thing they look at right? They don't even realize they are doing it. It just happens. I AM SO EMBARRASSED.<br />
<br />
And then it dawns on me. I have a scarf on, I am flat chested, I am pale from having chemo a week ago. They know I have cancer. Maybe one of these young men has a grandma with cancer, maybe a mom? They know, they understand. It's NO BIG DEAL.<br />
<br />
We ended up having a wonderful lunch(for the kids, the food there is turning my stomach) complete with a chocolate shake. Once I realized that no, not everyone was looking at my chest we went happily on our way to the clinic for my bloods draws.<br />
<br />
So I learned that while Shirts and Shoes are required at McDonalds, boobs are optional.<br />
<br />
All Bible verses are from the New Living TranslationMelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-78297798975334813622012-03-17T04:28:00.000-07:002012-03-17T04:28:56.571-07:00Theology of a three year oldSo Zane has been a real source of laughter this last week. I thought I would share a few.<br />
<br />
After putting sandals on for the first time since last year. He was pretty excited to have sandals on...<br />
<br />
<b>"Mom, you don't need socks with sandals! Nope, no socks, just feet."</b><br />
<br />
Overheard conversations with Zane and Cora.<br />
<br />
While playing mom and dad.<br />
<br />
<b>"Zane, you know our kids died, they got stepped on by a coyote"</b><br />
<br />
While going to Seward for McDonalds<b> </b><br />
<br />
<b> "Tora, I know how to drive, you push that button and it turns the brake on"</b><br />
<br />
After scooping the black kitty off the road (one of my favorites) I told them that they better stay off the highway or the same could happen to the them. Zane responded with<br />
<b>"Well you have to look both ways, the black kitty didn't AND he didn't have a adult with him." </b><br />
<br />
On the way back from Seward<br />
<br />
"Tora, we have church tomorrow and we go to a monster church, but they are just nice monsters." <br />
<br />
And my favorite<br />
<br />
Zane: Mom, did you see that red tractor over there.<br />
Me: Yes<br />
Zane: It didn't have a bucket on it, why it not have a bucket on it.<br />
Me: Not sure<br />
Zane: Cause God made it that way.<br />
Me: Really?<br />
Zane: No, God didn't make that, the workers did.<br />
Me: Yes, but God made the workers that made that tractor<br />
Zane: Yes and I like God so he made me. And he made Jesus. And God is going to get him.<br />
Me: Really, God is going to get Jesus for doing what?<br />
Zane: Not he is going to get Jesus, like if you gets lost or if you gets hurt or if a dinosaur steps on you. God is going to get Jesus.<br />
Me: Oh, so if you need Jesus, God will get him to help you?<br />
Zane: YES<br />
Me: Oh that is good to know. I will make sure I call for Jesus if a dinosaur steps on me.<br />
<br />
I think I should change my blog to, "When a dinosaur stepped on me"Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-76136198189419115202012-03-17T03:54:00.001-07:002012-03-17T08:20:19.301-07:00Update March 17It's been awhile since I have posted. I have been bad about keeping everyone updated here since I do it so much on Facebook then I am reminded that there are some that are some keeping track of things here that may not be on Facebook. So I will give you all on update then I am going to work on some posts that I have started and some that I need to get started on.<br />
<br />
I had my last chemo March 8th. The previous time I had what they thought was a slight allergic reaction to the carboplatin, which is one of the drugs. The wanted to keep an eye on that since it's been known to get worse each time after that when it's given. So, guess what, had a pretty strong reaction to it this time around. My vitals stayed good, my heart rate went up a bit which is it be expected because it scared me a bit, well, a lot. They gave me some drugs to help with the reaction and my reaction to the reaction that pretty much knocked me out. I was still able to drag myself to Ruby Tuesday to eat at the salad bar, you know, you gotta do what you gotta do. They had stopped the carboplatin so I only received one drug instead of three. The last, herception they are waiting to give me more of because it may have caused some damage to my heart. I am having more testing on the 26th. It's a known side effect to this drug. Not sure yet if the they can medically reverse any of this damage so pray if you can. My next and hopefully last chemo is March 29th<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001048/">more info about herceptin here</a><br />
<br />
If you want a chuckle go to that link and look at the side effects, I have had everyone of those I think. It's like no kidding, I guess it doesn't give you cancer. I especially like this warning <br />
<br />
Before receiving trastuzumab injection,<br />
<ul><li>tell your doctor and pharmacist if you are allergic to trastuzumab, medications made from <b>Chinese hamster ovary cell protein</b>, any other medications, or benzyl alcohol. <b>Ask your pharmacist if you are not sure if a medication you are allergic to is made from Chinese hamster ovary cell protein </b>or contains benzyl alcohol.<br />
<br />
<br />
You really can't say they aren't look high and low for the cure for breast cancer <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> </div></li>
</ul>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-2642818382692110622012-02-02T10:36:00.000-08:002012-02-02T10:36:55.839-08:00Good newsA couple of weeks ago I found out that Susan G Komen had given money to Planned Parenthood as a grant for mammograms. Now I am all for low or free screenings for women that are in need of this. But in my eyes it was like saying that a serial killer should be given money so they could do something good for the community. Anyway, a friend sent me this press release. I did a quick search for the Lincoln affiliate. If you stand with me on this, please send them a quick email thanking them for the decision. I believe they would also be the ones to contact if you know of someone in need of a low cost or free screening. Every baby is a gift from God and is valuable. In a culture that just screams for equal rights for all, as a nation, we are not giving those rights to the most vulnerable.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.komennebraska.org/" target="_blank"><u>Nebraska Affiliate</u></a><br />
P.O. Box 461236<br />
Papillion, NE 68046<br />
Phone: (402) 502-2979<br />
Fax: (402) 991-8591<br />
Email Address: <a href="mailto:lynette@komennebraska.org">lynette@komennebraska.org</a><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_13281908102431552"> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal" id="yui_3_2_0_1_13281908102431549"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_13281908102431546" style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_13281908102431543" style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:<br />
2/2/12<br />
CONTACT:<br />
Julie Schmit-Albin, Executive Director<br />
<a href="" rel="nofollow">402-318-8291</a> Cell<br />
<br />
Click below for audio from 1110AM KFAB<br />
<a href="http://www.kfab.com/player/?mid=21783918" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><span class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1328206402_1">http://www.kfab.com/player/?mid=21783918</span></a></span></span></div></div><div> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><br />
Julie Schmit-Albin on KFAB's Good Morning Show re: Susan G. Komen Decision</span></span></div></div><div> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">NEBRASKA</span></span> RIGHT TO LIFE SUPPORTS SUSAN G. KOMEN FOUNDATION'S DECISION TO STOP FUNDING PLANNED PARENTHOOD</div></div><div> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">LINCOLN</span></span> --Nebraska Right to Life is joining National Right to Life in supporting the Susan B. Komen Foundation's decision to stop funding grants to Planned Parenthood affiliates.<br />
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"The Susan B. Komen Foundation's grants to Planned Parenthood affiliates amounted to $680,000.00 in 2011 and $580,000.00 in 2010." said Julie Schmit-Albin, NRL Executive Director. "That's a drop in the bucket for a billion dollar entity like Planned Parenthood. This isn't so much about losing money for Planned Parenthood as it is about being rejected by the nation's most recognized breast cancer charity. It impedes Planned Parenthood's goal to mainstream itself into American society and tamp down the stigma of being the largest abortion provider in the country."<br />
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"As a breast cancer survivor and pro-life activist, I am but one of thousands of other pro-lifers who will now be able to support Susan G. Komen's Race for the Cure and other activities." said Schmit-Albin. "What Komen loses in support from this decision will be made up by an influx of Americans who will gladly acknowledge their rejection of Planned Parenthood with their donations and support."<br />
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</div></div></div><div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"> <span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Nebraska</span></span> Right to Life </div><div> <div> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1328206402_2"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">404 S. 11th St</span></span> .<br />
PO Box 80410<br />
Lincoln , NE 68501</span></div></div><div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Phone:<span style="color: #1f497d;"><span style="color: #1f497d;"> </span></span><a href="" rel="nofollow">402.438.4802</a> </span></span></div></div><div> <div> <div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://www.nerighttolife.org/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><span class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1328206402_3">www.nerighttolife.org</span></a><br />
<strong><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: Times New Roman;"><span style="color: #cc0000;">Find Us On Facebook & Twitter Too, Updated Daily!</span></span></b></strong></span></span></div></div></div><div class="yiv917239504MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"> <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/Nebraska-Right-to-Life-State-Affiliate-of-National-Right-to-Life/109243449276" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><span style="color: black;"><span style="color: windowtext; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="facebook.png" border="0" height="27" id="yiv917239504_x0000_i1025" src="http://us.mg4.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f1589585%5fAHuliGIAAMYoTyrSPgx%2feksq%2fow&pid=2&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo" width="27" /></span></span></a><span style="color: #1f497d;"><span style="color: #1f497d;"> </span></span><a href="http://twitter.com/#%21/NERightToLife" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><span style="color: black;"><span style="color: windowtext; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="twitter.png" border="0" height="28" id="yiv917239504_x0000_i1026" src="http://us.mg4.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f1589585%5fAHuliGIAAMYoTyrSPgx%2feksq%2fow&pid=3&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo" width="28" /></span></span></a></span></span></div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-5778525064420298312012-01-14T14:11:00.000-08:002012-01-14T14:11:10.569-08:00MOPS Pink OutThank you to all my MOPS sisters who helped with me Pink Out in October. It's comforting even now to think back on that day and remember it for all the hugs, tears and laughs instead of absolute terror for what I might face in the coming weeks.<br />
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For some who wonder why I haven't been so scared, I am surrounded by godly women!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zgDw9NWfZLs/TxH2rQCr6-I/AAAAAAAAABM/EBx0loSu2lI/s1600/DSC_0633.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zgDw9NWfZLs/TxH2rQCr6-I/AAAAAAAAABM/EBx0loSu2lI/s320/DSC_0633.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> Ribbons Jessica handed out!</div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gxdHqlwGQqM/TxH3Mnlv3PI/AAAAAAAAABU/SUJVa3XFuyM/s1600/DSC_0657.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gxdHqlwGQqM/TxH3Mnlv3PI/AAAAAAAAABU/SUJVa3XFuyM/s320/DSC_0657.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> Craft time!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-E4dxUu5vza8/TxH3tQZFJwI/AAAAAAAAABc/eIzgwikN62c/s1600/DSC_0647.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-E4dxUu5vza8/TxH3tQZFJwI/AAAAAAAAABc/eIzgwikN62c/s320/DSC_0647.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> We were making candy bars into mummies and pumpkins</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8yozTgF7ddk/TxH4SgVyuoI/AAAAAAAAABk/rOUI2Ihd4Ac/s1600/DSC_0645.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8yozTgF7ddk/TxH4SgVyuoI/AAAAAAAAABk/rOUI2Ihd4Ac/s320/DSC_0645.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wkDBFZLhR7w/TxH44MtoQiI/AAAAAAAAABs/eSKbANTrcso/s1600/DSC_0644.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wkDBFZLhR7w/TxH44MtoQiI/AAAAAAAAABs/eSKbANTrcso/s320/DSC_0644.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">I am the discussion group leader for a crazy table, there was "talk" that we would get trouble more than other tables for talking......</div><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mPN8aNF1S0o/TxH689dMJpI/AAAAAAAAAB8/QMnZcnYXjSc/s1600/DSC_0640.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mPN8aNF1S0o/TxH689dMJpI/AAAAAAAAAB8/QMnZcnYXjSc/s400/DSC_0640.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-76799838193162566012012-01-08T18:29:00.000-08:002012-01-08T18:29:29.514-08:00Second ChemoHad my second infusion on Thursday, things went very smooth until Sat midday. My body aches and nothing sounds good to eat, so I sleep, I wake up because my body hurts, probably from being in bed so long! Darin and Kailey did a great job taking care of me, brought me what I thought I could eat and entertained Zane. We have had three hot meals provided to us this weekend from friends and family, so blessed!<br />
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After my first infusion, my white blood cell count took a nosedive, so I now have to receive a shot to boost my white blood cells(5700 bucks!!!) We are well insured, have not paid a thing...yet but next time I hear of a benefit for medical expenses for someone fighting cancer, I know why, this stuff is pricey! The shot causes flu like symptoms but was told very clearly if I do run a fever the are "obligated to admit me to the hospital" yikes, lets try to avoid that!<br />
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I do feel a bit better today than yesterday and trying to focus on that. I have the time to do more writing, a bunch good stuff has happened but I still have "chemo brain" where I have a hard time making sense of some things so I think I will hold off.<br />
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The hair on my head is making a mass exit, the hair on my legs is still there, what is wrong with this medicine anyway?! Handling the hair thing pretty well, I think because I can just avoid mirrors, I am reminded of my mastectomy each time I look down. I got a new Kindle Fire for Christmas from Darin and have been using it a bunch, Sat morning it decided not to charge so I will need to call about that. Getting casted for my falsies on Tuesday, Bible Study on Wednesday, MOPS Friday.<br />
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So some frustrating things and some things to really look forward to. Choosing to worship Him through all this, love you Jesus, glad to know you are right here with me.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-32671542174629717342011-12-15T18:52:00.000-08:002011-12-15T18:52:26.401-08:00Warrior JuiceWell, received my first warrior juice installment today (chemo) it's draining some of my human strength so the warrior strength can fight the cancer. Oh how I still long for Jesus to just speak and heal me. But I also know He is making me more like Him through this, He has a lot of work to do and He needs us to do it. I need to look with compassion, speak to others when I feel the urge, give hugs tell them how much I love them. I will never be close to be like the character of God. I am so marred with sin and human yuckiness so I need to FOLLOW really close behind Him and listen to His Words so I can try just a little to be like Him.<br />
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Anyway, I feel OK, much like my morning sickness with Zane. We did notice that I lost almost all color to my face even when I am feeling ok. Which is kinda weird since I always have a reddish look to my cheeks. I am tired and a little queasy at times but really doing ok. My guys are doing ok I think, spent some time down stairs with Zane and now him and dad seem to be getting along ok with a bath and bedtime.<br />
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If I feel up to it, Michelle and I are going to go Lincoln to get fitted for my falsies. ha ha. Be warned...here we come!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-56012040259245756502011-12-06T07:35:00.000-08:002011-12-06T07:35:49.415-08:00Supporting those around youIt's been awhile since my last post. I have a lot to write about but it seems by the time I get done what I need to get done I am wiped out. I had been writing after Zane went to bed but it seems like he goes to bed later and I go to bed earlier!<br />
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To update those that may not be aware of the next phase. I start my chemo treatments on December 15th. It lasts about five hours. I will be taking those treatments every three weeks for a total of six treatments. I also will be having an infusion of an antibody called hermectin (spelling?) every week until the end of March, then every three weeks until December 2012. That infusion takes about an 1.5 hours and there will not be side effects to that. We have some great options for Zane each Thursday, I am wanting to keep it consistent and there are ways we can do that. To start in December we are going to find what works. Grandma Nancy is taking him on the 22nd for the "short" infusion to go spoil him. She has thought of all sorts of things to do with him. My sister also has some flexibility around the holidays to watch him. In Jan, we are going to make a decision on where he will go each Thursday, and with the three or four options I am very comfortable with each of them.<br />
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Now for a little insight to my day yesterday and a lesson for me and I hope others that are reading this.<br />
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Have you looked around and noticed all they ways you can "support" people. T-shirts, ribbons, car magnets, yogurt tops...the list goes on.<br />
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I ended up in Lincoln yesterday morning at Zane's Dr office with a suspicious looking rash by his nose (just dry skin thank goodness) then off to find snow pants and snow boots that fit. But you see I was SUPPOSED to be at an appointment to find a different wig, the one I picked out doesn't come in the color I need. Zane was going to be at a friends house but I was not thrilled about sending him over there to infect her three kids with what looked like impetigo. A good way to loose a sitter :)<br />
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I am usually very prepared for clothes for Zane, finding a good deal on name brand clothes at a thrift or consignment stores. Finding cute clothes for him is something I really enjoy, I waited for a baby for so long I just couldn't wait to spoil him! <br />
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Sunday after church, start the stress.....The first I realized that his snow pants were a bit too small and he could only wear his snow boots without the liners was when I searched for about half an hour on Sunday for all the gear so he could go play in the snow. With two surgeries a month apart, Dr appointments and the like, it kinda slipped my mind. And it seems like winter just showed up all of a sudden around here.<br />
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One thing that really has been hard for me is that when my cancer has impeded on my life. Things I enjoy and people I love are being pushed aside for things that are really not enjoyable, and at times, downright terrifying. Did I mention since my last surgery that Zane doesn't want me out of the room? Even to the point of sitting in the bathroom while I shower, even if Dad is home. This was one particular evening when I was having a very hard time with my new appearance and a very hard time not bawling while showering, the whole time he is singing "TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR!" at the top of his lungs. It ended up being one of those laughing/crying moments.<br />
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So you see why I haven't written lately, there is SO much. I am getting to my point, really....so I go into the office, a new office as of last spring. A whole another story on how we ended up there which shows how detailed God really is! Kathy who we see there gives Him the glory through her work, it was evident the first time I met her. She has received the notes from the Zane's appointment at UNMC in end of October regarding his visit. We had mentioned that I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer (it had been just two weeks I think) in case it played a part in his healthcare. So Kathy sees this and immediately asks how I am doing. Realizing she "knows" I say, well it's been kinda crazy at our house! She shared with me that she is a cancer survivor and that there is a gal in the office there who is a breast cancer survivor. She takes a look at Zane then asks if I want to see this gal to talk to her a bit. So she came in and it was good to talk to someone who has really been there and understands what I am going through. Actually, it was just nice to cry with someone who really knew how I felt.<br />
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Support.....<br />
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We head over to Old Navy to find new jeans for Zane and hopefully a coat and pants. Zane is being picky and keeps wandering around the store and loading things in the cart he thinks he needs. Including a $9.00 football. I decided to wait to battle until we get up to the checkout. We find a coat, one he likes so much he wants to wear it out. Good thing because the one he had on was really not warm enough to be walking around in outside. I get to the checkout and hand the gal the ball asking if it's really nine bucks. It is, I tell Zane too expensive, he gladly says ok, if he can take it back. I say, ok, we will do it together. He starts whining about it and gets behind the checkout stand to find it (he is kinda strong willed, he gets it from his dad :) She hands him the ball and he takes off running. I think, well ok, I am by the door so he can't get out and I can see him almost all the way there. She finishes and he isn't back. People are starting to line up behind me. I finish running my card and realize, I didn't pay for the coat! The checker said, just go grab the tag off it and she will ring it up. People are starting to get impatient. I am worried more about the fact he isn't back. I run back there and as it turns out the balls had fallen out when he tried to put his ball back and was trying to get them all stacked up again. I grab the tag and tell him to run back with me (running, ugh!) we are greeted with more impatient looks. Zane sets off the alarm. Apparently there is a tag that needs to be cut out. The gal behind me walks by and says, I bet he sets them off in all the stores and smiles.<br />
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We head out to the parking lot and I work on getting buckled in. I can't lift him easily so I wait for him to climb in. Someone is wanting in their car next to me. I step aside, let her in, wait for her to back out. She laughs and says he has three grown boys and remembers those times! I go back and work on getting the straps readjusted. Someone is waiting for the space right next to me. I step aside, well you get the gist...<br />
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My point to all of this. Don't worry too much about showing your support through ribbons, t shirts and magnets. (though they are ONE nice way to show support)<br />
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When you are busy driving to and from work or shopping, trying to find a parking space or standing in line when a lady and her crazy kid are trying to check out keep in mind, you don't know what they are going through, you don't need to know the whole story, but GOD DOES and wants YOU to show them the support they need to just get through the day and maybe make things a little more normal even when their lives are far from normal. <br />
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If you are having a hard time waiting, take the time you are waiting to pray for them......God has the time to listen.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-85592220301279588852011-11-20T20:52:00.000-08:002011-11-20T20:52:55.023-08:00UpdateJust a quick update. Surgery went well, I am back home again and feelingn good pain wise. It's an adjustment that is for sure. I keep thinking I will get used to the fact that both my breasts are gone but it's hasn't happened very quickly. ((smile))<br />
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When I can keep my thoughts together (when I can cut down on pain meds) I will get everyone up to speed. Pray for my family, Darin is tired and Zane doesn't understand very much of why I can't do much.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-30036631260179941162011-11-11T21:16:00.000-08:002011-11-11T21:16:28.709-08:00How can you help?Surgery is planned for next Friday November 18th. Surgery will be around ten in the morning, mid afternoon when I am in the room. They are expecting me to stay a couple of nights unless I am good then might leave on Sat.<br />
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First, please cover us in prayer. The upcoming surgery is going to be hard on us emotionally. We know there is a cost, and this is it but it's still hard. Second item of prayer and praise I guess is that is also Kailey's 16th birthday! A new step of independance for her, please cover her in prayer for safety and guidance.<br />
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Freezer meals are welcome! One thing I craved after my last surgery is cookies so cookie dough would also be appreciated. I can't do nuts or peanut butter.<br />
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Second, you can sign up to see my calendar where I will be posting when I need help for appts etc. Keep in mind that right now Darin is going to many of my appointments but as soon as we get moved into the treatment portion of this I will be looking for more help. I LOVE that so many are wanting to help right now!<br />
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Here is where you can sign up. You have to register because there is going to be sensitive info on where I am going to be, where Zane is etc for our safety the info isn't out there for the world to see!<br />
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<a href="https://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/c/649503/">https://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/c/649503/</a><br />
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I will be blogging more on my experiences this week later on. Kinda feeling overwhelmed right now with everything I THINK I need to get done. Honestly, I think as soon as I get the house vacuumed and dusted I will feel like it's all under control. It won't take long but I always put it off. Have a good weekend all!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-22534616045072958822011-11-07T20:26:00.000-08:002011-11-07T20:26:12.448-08:00To touch the hem of His robe<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"> </span><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">I haven't had much to post in the last week. We have been praising Him for the good news and praying for guidance to get through the rest of the treatment. We have an appointment tomorrow with the plastic surgeon and with Dr Cody. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Big decisions to make. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">What provided Zane his only source of nourishment for three months might have to go so they don't kill me. This won't be a complete restoration. As advanced as treatments have progressed against the fight against breast cancer, they aren't complete. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Matthew 9:20-22</span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">"Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.” Jesus turned and saw her. </span><span class="woj" style="font-size: small;">“Take heart, daughter,”</span><span style="font-size: small;"> he said, </span><span class="woj" style="font-size: small;">“your faith has healed you.”</span> And the woman was healed at that moment. "</div><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Jesus can and did heal from a distance, she didn't need to touch His cloak but she took action to pursue Jesus so she might be healed. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">The woman who was not allowed to worship God in the temple for 12 years still had so much faith in His Son that she reached out for Him. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">A woman in Jesus' time, not allowed in the temple and even without "being unclean" was not valued in society, but Jesus valued women. The unclean, the undervalued, the broken, the sick are His specialty because of their faith they reach out for their Savior, their Healer. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">YOUR Savior, YOUR Healer. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Yeshua</span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">How many times in the last four weeks have I yearned to reach out and touch His robe and have complete restoration. </span></div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">But then again, maybe I don't want to be what I was before.</span></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"></span></div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-12128227221694002772011-11-02T19:39:00.000-07:002011-11-02T19:39:17.992-07:00PET Scan resultsHad the PET scan yesterday. Pretty easy, was injected with radioactive isotopes, took an hour to pray and rest, put on a bed that when into a short tube (though when your torso is fully enclosed it seems like a longer tube. It didn't last long though until my head was out and they just scanned my body. Then was given instructions to drink lots of water, flush the toilet twice after using it and not to hold any infants. Easy everyday stuff......YIKES<br />
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We got the results from the PET scan. The cancer did NOT spread past those lymph nodes on the right side. There is some cancer left in the breast area and I will need another surgery. We are meeting with a plastic surgeon next Tuesday to get a clearer look at my options, one that we are looking at is a bi lateral mastectomy which would be full removal of both breasts with reconstruction. We aren't taking this decision lightly though we are making quite a few jokes about it to keep us laughing (instead of worrying :) Please pray for us as we move into the treatment stage.<br />
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Treating cancer is not easy but we are choosing to look at this as a trial like many of you are facing, there are people out there we are mourning a loss of a loved one, have a child who is sick or having problems just being a teenager, depression, anger, family problems, marriage problems, dealing with unforgiveness either with someone else or not able to forgive themselves. <br />
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Jesus is there waiting for you. When you think you can not see Him in your trial, look behind you, He is holding you on His lap. You are His and whatever you are facing has to bow down to the King of Kings because if you have Jesus in your heart, you are pure gold! Set down what ever is holding you back at the foot of the throne, Jesus can take it for you.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-41390139749300374632011-10-29T15:17:00.000-07:002011-10-29T15:17:23.312-07:00Sinking inThe appointment yesterday when great and was the hardest part so far. Kelli, Darin and I went together, really liked the Dr. The staff is friendly and compassionate. I can't imagine having their job.<br />
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Since a week ago Friday I have been wrestling. Not sure with what, myself, God or the Devil. Maybe a bit of each. We had decided early on that WE would worship HIM through all of this. Great thought, hard to do. I guess I am learning what it means for me to worship Him. Is it going to church, sitting through through a nice service, singing nice songs, praying and taking communion....well...yes. BUT.....<br />
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It's what you do when you wake up at two o clock in the morning and being remind yourself "YOU have cancer".<br />
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It's what you do when you wonder if you will be around long enough for your three year old to remember you.<br />
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It's what you do when you wonder what you did to get cancer at 39.<br />
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Then CHOOSE to remind yourself that<br />
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Jesus, the Name above all names, Healer, the Great I AM is also living inside me. <br />
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Jesus, the Master, the Bridegroom, loves my family even more than I do.<br />
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And remind Satan to stand behind me because I am so loved by the creator of the ALL and His angels are standing guard over me.<br />
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And I am going to step forward and<br />
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Go to MOPS, Bible Study, fellowship, pray, read the Word and WORSHIP Him because I can worry about this all next week until we get those results of those tests but it won't change a thing. But choosing to worship Him can change a lot.<br />
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Who am I going to encounter at the store, the restaurant.<br />
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Am I going to be a light?<br />
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What can I do for my husband...Kailey...Zane...family....friends.<br />
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God see our past, forgives us and know what lies ahead.<br />
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Satan can only look behind and remind us of what we did wrong, what has been done to us. Yep, he can just stand behind me then because I need to receive the gift that God has granted me of peace and I can only do that if I am OPEN to receive it.<br />
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So what is with the title of this post anyway, I am sinking? well sometimes, is it starting to sink in I have cancer, yeah, kinda...but hopefully it's sinking in that I need to be shapeable, moldable, open to receive Him when all I feel like doing is shutting down. Maybe I am learning what it really means to worship?Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-52009340863699907942011-10-25T17:35:00.000-07:002011-10-25T17:35:15.754-07:00NewsWe got some "news" today. A REALLY good news, kinda not good news deal.<br />
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First, I will have to have another surgery, they don't believe they got all the cancer from the breast. BUT they do believe they got ALL the cancer from the lymph nodes and that it didn't go any further. So the next step is to meet with the oncologist and get a treatment plan figured out then decide on surgery based on that. That would be the time to ad the chemo port etc.<br />
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I am actually euphoric right now. I mean really, I haven't really been able to talk to anyone except family about this, not know if I was going to be fighting for my life.<br />
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THIS IS GOOD NEWS!<br />
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Yes, chemo is going to be hard on me, radiation is going to stink to go in each day. I might loose my hair. The holiday's this year are probably going to be hard. BUT I will most likely see Thanksgiving, Christmas and celebrate another anniversary with my wonderful husband next year! How does that song go...<br />
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"You've got to accentuate the positive<br />
Eliminate the negative<br />
And latch on to the affirmative<br />
Don't mess with Mister In-Between"<br />
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We have so many friends and family asking what they can do to help. Right now, we in a holding pattern on that. It will depend on when my treatments start, how sick I will be, surgery etc. We will be putting together a calendar where you can sign up to help out if you want. Another "blessing" from this is that John and Maralee (my outlaws :) are home from traveling for awhile, that is a big boost for us!<br />
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I have had some people also give us "advice" on what we should so. There are MANY resources we have used already to get through the maze of cancer. We plan on continue to use those resources and many more. Yes, we are planning on getting a second opinion on treatment, there will be tests to see if the cancer has spread any further etc, we really appreciate the love that people are showing us through this. THANK YOU!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-34911757647002558872011-10-23T19:29:00.000-07:002011-10-23T19:29:33.375-07:00Food Therapy<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XQAGuv8S6cg/TqTLVJyWZuI/AAAAAAAAAA8/u52w4PzdBgM/s1600/gifts.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XQAGuv8S6cg/TqTLVJyWZuI/AAAAAAAAAA8/u52w4PzdBgM/s320/gifts.jpg" width="320" /></a>Darin and I have been up and down emotionally since surgery. Just waiting to hear what treatment is going to be just makes us feel like we are in limbo, which we are, it just can't be helped. It hurts for me to type and harder to even think right now of what the road might be, chemo, how sick will I get, etc.<br />
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I am planning on going to my MIL's to stay entertained tomorrow. This was tonight's therapy. BIG thank you to Tammy, Kailey's mom for this bacon, corned beef laden, gravy laden chicken with cheesy hash browns, corn, muffins and dessert. Oh my goodness, it was good and just the carb therapy we needed tonight. Topped off with a visit from my John and Maralee (Darin's parents) helped the evening fly by. <br />
We will know more sometime this week, we hope, with the results from tests due back Tuesday and hopefully an appoint with the oncologist.<br />
Also a trip to UNMC on Thursday for Zane to get a baseline, we found out this summer he has horseshoe kidney. Nothing serious but something that needs to be watched. He is a healthy and happy boy! He has been great about letting me sleep and Darin is awesome on keeping up on the housework and keeping him entertained (with a four wheeler ride so I could nap!) Please keep the prayers coming and we will know soon what we are going to be facing for sure and what help we need. Thanks so much! Love you all!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-9053854162630374932011-10-20T18:49:00.000-07:002011-10-20T18:49:38.170-07:00SupportOne thing God has really shown me through the last week is how much a card, meal or a hug can mean to someone. When I get "better" I am going to be MUCH more deliberate on sending cards and showing people how much I care about them and how much I love them. I have yet to compile all the FB and email I have received. Humbled......<br />
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My "oldest" brother's family, Tim and Darla. Kids left to right is Brenna, Asa, Fulton and Graem <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1Bt1QaGxXPg/TqDL2QefmEI/AAAAAAAAAAU/YWWa5UvD498/s1600/pink+klopfensteins.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1Bt1QaGxXPg/TqDL2QefmEI/AAAAAAAAAAU/YWWa5UvD498/s320/pink+klopfensteins.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-7UlR0L-yefA/TqDL_f1SrXI/AAAAAAAAAAc/o0BBke4ldYs/s1600/more+pink+klopfensteins.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="143" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-7UlR0L-yefA/TqDL_f1SrXI/AAAAAAAAAAc/o0BBke4ldYs/s320/more+pink+klopfensteins.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Cards received and put into a book!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7f-BwN0zGL4/TqDMSHr5eII/AAAAAAAAAAk/HP-4KuZh5Tw/s1600/gifts+003.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7f-BwN0zGL4/TqDMSHr5eII/AAAAAAAAAAk/HP-4KuZh5Tw/s320/gifts+003.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> A meal made by a family at church, The Koch's!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-9uJv9rRBnrE/TqDMlJ8SEWI/AAAAAAAAAAs/F4xrFRsjZPs/s1600/gifts+001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-9uJv9rRBnrE/TqDMlJ8SEWI/AAAAAAAAAAs/F4xrFRsjZPs/s320/gifts+001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> Supper brought over to us by the neighbors and good friends Joe and Christi Arnold. Christi's dad and Darin are partners with one of the trucks they run. Great people!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-QlVyzGGWs1A/TqDM4DLp-nI/AAAAAAAAAA0/PX7_4CR2EaQ/s1600/gifts+002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-QlVyzGGWs1A/TqDM4DLp-nI/AAAAAAAAAA0/PX7_4CR2EaQ/s320/gifts+002.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-61087320251361160662011-10-19T20:12:00.000-07:002011-10-19T20:12:59.885-07:00Pink Out!Wednesday nights at church have been a passion of mine for about five years. I love seeing the kids learn about Jesus and how much He loves them. We do a meal, worship service and classes for adults and youth. We have been invited someone to come speak at our church service each Wednesday night to give a testimony of something God has done in their life.<br />
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Turns out, tonight was the night that my dad came to speak. Darin, Dad, Nancy (my step mom) and I met outside and walked in together. When I walked into fellowship hall and I look around at everyone eating I realize that almost everyone is wearing pink or has a pink ribbon on their shirt or hat. It was so great! I had little ones coming up and hugging on me, hugs, questions and a few tears and a lot of "it's going to be ok", (it really is, regardless of what happens) It took my breath away. At the end of the service we circle up for prayer and they had so many prayer request for me they did a time of silent prayer for all those battling cancer and other illnesses then we passed the mic.<br />
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Please also let's pray for those that are battling cancer without support.<br />
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With my family, Living Word Church family, Free Church family, MOPS family, IHOP prayer room, Faith Lutheran church family and many other prayer warriors praying for me<br />
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I WILL BEAT THIS!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-3285691711203025982011-10-18T20:05:00.000-07:002011-10-18T20:05:14.218-07:00The story continuesA week ago.... I am at Bible Study at the Free Church, I have been going to the women's Bible study there for almost two years. It isn't my "home" church but I call Pastor Curt my "other pastor". I found this Bible Study group when I signed Zane up for Kindermusik that a member of our church had told us about. I met Jessica, I ended up getting getting put into a different class then we thought we were signing up for. The other class if full, I tell her I think that sometimes this happens for a reason so we just go with the class she has us in. Two weeks into the class, they tell me about MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) that meets at the church, asks me to come. They are having a food party. Woo hoo! I go, have a GREAT time and Dayna invites me to Bible Study that has child care. The first time I went I felt a strong presence from the Holy Spirit and have grown spiritually leaps and bounds since. More on this later....<br />
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Back to Bible study, we begin with prayer requests and then start reading in Exodus about the plagues, which is what we are studying. I get a call from a Lincoln number and have a pretty good idea who it is. I answer and it's Dr. G. My stomach does a flip. He asks me "So what happened yesterday" so I know he didn't get my message I left about the biopsy so he is checking in with me to let me know they will call with results right?<br />
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He says, lets talk, go find a place you can sit down and have privacy. He continues with "I really hate these calls but you do have cancer" WHAT? I start crying, not even sure what he is saying. I remember, hearing surgery...radiation...treatable...early. WHAT? Who are we talking about? I need to call Darin, right away...Dr G says that a nurse will call me later when it has sunk in more, call him personally if I need to talk.<br />
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I went back next door to the group and totally break down. They cry with me and pray over me. Give me words of wisdom and hope. Joan (Pastor Curt's wife) takes me to go find a pastor to help me call Darin. Pastor Curt is out of the building, Pastor Myer is on the phone, Pastor Dan is available. Joan tells him the situation and we talk and pray and he helps me call Darin. Pastor Lowell comes in, with Nan, his wife who is a breast cancer survivor. (did I mention God is very detailed). Nan tells me that they wouldn't change a thing of what they have been through Exactly what I needed to hear!!! They leave, Pastor Dan and I are figuring out what I should do next, Darin is in Weeping Water getting a load and won't be home for an hour.<br />
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I call one of my dearest friends, Shawn, tell her over the phone, something I really hated to do. We both cry more, then I hear in the hallway that Pastor is there, I am thinking Pastor Curt came back, no it's Pastor Jim, the pastor from our church. Pastor Curt had talked to Joan then he stopped Pastor Jim in the parking lot where they were meeting for the Ministerial Association in Seward. My in-laws pastor is there and they can share with him too so he can be prepared. The sight of Pastor Jim makes me break down again and I am passed from Pastor Dan to Pastor Jim. He prays with me, gets me figured out what to do about getting Zane and getting to Shawn's house. I get to preschool (a Christian organization) and go right to director's office. Two weeks before she had given her testimony at a Wednesday night service at our home church. I share with her the news, more words of hope and she tells me that if needed they have an unusual situation of extra room if Zane needs extended care. That put my mind at ease though at the time I didn't realize the outpouring of support that would be offered to help watch Zane. Zane and I head to Shawn's house where we wait until Darin gets home. I will post another time how God has blessed me with Shawn. VERY cool story!Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-23580845103979055892011-10-18T09:07:00.000-07:002011-10-18T09:07:00.415-07:00Update on SurgerySurgery is at 11:00am on Friday. I will be staying overnight. Please be praying for pain relief for me. I guess when they inject the radiation, I am not under yet and it can be quite painful.<br />
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My sister will be watching Zane, probably with his cousins and will have a blast that day. From what I understand, many women go back to work on Monday after the surgery. We are supposed to know the results of the test on Tuesday.Melissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7664960865324768995.post-54278045316303881972011-10-18T06:25:00.000-07:002011-10-18T06:25:34.597-07:00Zane's PreschoolZane is a social butterfly. He walks around church shaking peoples hands during sharing of the peace (by himself sometimes requiring a search and rescue to see where he ended up), chats it up with the ladies in the chiropractor office (they all know his name and call me Zane's mom), talks about my friends as if they are his friends too (Where is Shawn,is that her truck?, is Linda at church eating lunch at church today?).<br />
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I got a strong urge that I needed to send him to preschool this fall. I really dug my heels in it at first. I wasn't ready for him to go! We decided on St. John's Child Development Center and are realizing that it really was God's hand guiding us, no matter how reluctant I was about it. Here are a few things I like about it. First, Zane is being taught relationship not religion there. They let those kids know that Jesus is right there with them, leading, guiding, protecting. The teachers and staff have the relationship too, it's evident in the way they talk to the kids and how they have comforted me this past week. One of the first couple of weeks, I caught Zane holding his teacher's hand. Anyone that knows Zane, knows this isn't typical of him. He is a snuggler but not a hand holder!<br />
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This is a portion of a prayer request send out by his teacher.<br />
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"Melissa Meyer (Zane's Mom)has recently found out<br />
that she has breast cancer. She will be having surgery <span class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1318943166_0">this Friday</span> and will<br />
know more after that in regards to the stage and severity. She would greatly <br />
appreciate your prayers at this time. Melissa has a very strong Christian support <br />
system and is fervent in prayer herself. She knows that God is in control and<br />
wants God to be glorified in this situation for their family."<br />
"My prayer for you Melissa is that you will have a full recovery and be able<br />
to enjoy your family will full gusto. I also pray that those you encounter through<br />
this situation will see your love for our Christ and be awed by His Grace. God's <br />
Peace be with you."<br />
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I am in awe of His grace that He would place these people in my life. I don't deserve it, no one does really, thank you Father for showing yourself through them. I am beginning to understand Your peace. AmenMelissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18216877272980065885noreply@blogger.com0